Igbo Traditional Marriage: A Colourful Celebration of Love and Culture

by Rex Clarke

Typically, the traditional Igbo wedding celebration is joyful and colourful. ‘Igba Nkwu’ is the Igbo term for traditional marriage, also known as ‘Wine Carrying Ceremony. The bride’s delivery of her father’s wine to her fiancé is crucial to the wedding ritual. According to Igbo customs, marriage is a multi-step procedure that can take several months to complete.

 

Marriage Introduction (Iku Aka or Iju Ese)

Before a traditional marriage ceremony is organised between a couple in Igbo land, a man must ordinarily obtain approval from the girl’s parents and the king’s men (Umunna). The suitor’s family must bring kegs of palm wine when visiting the lady’s family. The acceptance of the wine is prompted by the tradition that wine taken to an intending bride’s home should not be returned to the suitor’s family, even if the young man is rejected.

 

Seconds Visit/Groom’s Escort Party

After the suitor’s initial visit to the girl’s family, both families will conduct a background check to determine whether the marriage will proceed. If satisfied with their findings, both families will agree on a date the suitor’s family will visit again to clarify their intentions. This time, the bride is asked several times before both families if she is prepared to marry the groom. Once she admits, planning and preparations for the marriage ceremony begin.

 

Bride Price (Ime Ego)

The groom and his family will pay the bride price following the girl’s family’s approval. The money spent on the bride is symbolic and does not necessarily reflect her value. In all regions of the Igbo nation, the only time a bride’s price is not paid at a traditional marriage ceremony is if the bride is already pregnant. In this instance, the bride price payment is deferred until she gives birth, as they consider this an abomination.

Neither the bride nor the groom has any input during the bride price phase. Before the groom’s family pays the bride price, the bride is called up again to reaffirm her interest in the groom so that the king’s men, ‘Umunna’ and her family can decide whether to proceed with the bride price and other rituals.

In Igbo culture, marriage is only legally recognised once the bride price is paid. The courts and customary law both recognise this. According to Igbo tradition, even if a woman separates from her husband and lives with another man, if her bride price is not returned to her first husband, any child she has for the new union belongs to the man who paid her bride price.

 

Wine Carrying (Igba Nkwu Nwanyi)

Igba Nkwu is the Igbo name for the marriage ceremony where the bride sought her husband with wine. Locals assert that the wine utilised for this event is unique and unaltered. Traditionally, wine is believed to strengthen the relationship between spouses and satisfymarital requirements. Additionally, the flavour of sweet and sour palm wine implies that marriage is not all fun and games. The ceremony is exciting and pleasurable as the bride searches for her spouse. This search has deep roots in Igbo tradition and culture.

The wine-carrying phase of a marriage is the fourth. In the bride’s parents’ hometown or village, the ceremony is generally done with the bride’s and groom’s extended family and their close friends. In the past, this was the only ceremony that united a man and a woman as husband and wife; there were no court or church weddings. Depending on the wishes of the couple or family, the ceremony could be elaborate or modest. Traditionally, the bride wears a blouse, wraps, red coral beads, and colourful headgear.

 

The Search Process

The search procedure is the defining characteristic of the Igbo traditional wedding, which sets it apart from other cultures. During this portion of the ceremony, in front of all guests and well-wishers, the bride finds her husband and serves him wine before guiding him to her parents.

The bride must remain indoors until her father summons her to greet the guests before the search. When she is called, the bride and her friends will appear and dance to the music. The bride will first greet everyone before departing to the room while the celebrations continue. In addition to food and drink, other entertainments like cultural dances are available.

When the bride returns to her room, she changes into fresh clothing and prepares to be called by her father in search of her future husband. This time, the bride is expected to find the groom and declare him her husband publicly. Therefore, the groom must first hide among the guests.

When the bride is ready to exit the room for the second time, she will dance towards her parents while her friends dance behind her as she approaches and kneels before her father. Her father offers her a glass of wine and orders her to present it to the man she wishes to marry. While dancing among the guests with a glass of wine, the bride searches for her spouse, and when she locates him, she kneels before him, drinks some wine, and then offers the remainder to him.

After accepting and consuming the wine, the groom leaves some money in the empty cup for the bride. The bride then presents her prospective husband to her father for approval while the audience cheers them. Before he blesses the pair, the father asks his daughter again if the young man in front of him is the one she wishes to marry. She offers affirmation and kneelswith her future husband before her father to ask for his consent. At this point, her father pronounces the pair married, blesses them, and offers them advice. After obtaining blessings, the audience will applaud her before they dance as husband and wife for the first time.

Conclusively, traditional marriage in Igbo land cannot be overlooked since a couple living together but not traditionally married cannot be considered husband and wife, even if they had a white wedding. Moreover, if such a union produces a child, the child is considered part of the lady’s family until the mother’s bride price has been paid. Traditional Igbo marriage signifies that the couple is lawfully married and has full marital rights according to Igbo law and custom.

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